had no idea
that expensive super gourmet
cat food with extra vitamins'
bought online
would produce these results
this four legged tiger
is probably a much better bet
than the two legged one
she always has been hankering for
it came as a shock
to all of us
|what a loss
our edna has gone
our comedic genius
was loved
will be missed
she showcased
ausssie humour
to the world
like no other
goodmight possum
requiescat in pace
King Charles was in contact with his longtime friend Barry Humphries during his time in hospital, it has been revealed.
Day 23
life is scary
move to the planet
of the mind
no one
can hurt you there
DAY 24
time
for a cosmetic
touch up
you don't need it
he said
you're a thinking man's
crumpet
really
what am i doing with you
then?
DAY 25
LEST WE FORGET
doesn't get more real than this
anzac day
thousands turn out
to honour our dead soldiers
we wear sprigs of rosemary
and family medals
hear all the stories
a lot of sadness and tears
followed by beers
the pubs are overflowing
spilling out onto the streets
people play two up
an illegal gambling game
the cops turn a blind eye to it
only on anzac day
My partner's father is pictured in this photo. Fortunately he was one of the lucky ones who survived and came home.
DAY 26
it has not been 24 hours
since Anzac Day
the marches the solemn commemoration
the camaraderie the festivities
it's as if none of it ever happened
flick the switch
everything back to normal
i often wonder
if this is the way to live
DAY 27
early to bed
early to rise
is only good
if you need to get to the airport
don't count your chickens
always have a secret stash
of geese
if at first you don't succeed
you will need connections
no one gets anywhere on merit alone
handsome is
and if they are charming as well
they can do anything they like
the proof of the pudding is
in the price tag
everything expensive tastes good
who's afraid of the big bad wolf
everyone
what makes fish nervous
a cat researching scuba diving gear
an apple a day
keeps the doctor away
it's not the apple
DAY 28
you are my sunshine
my only sunshine
who gets
a dozen sydney rock oysters
a chilled glass of white wine
a bunch of flowers
on a Friday night
OK
so he forgot
to get the
eggs
milk
bread
pick up the mail
put petrol in the car
yesterday
BUT
all is forgiven
today
YES
i can be bought
DAY 29
the sight of the small boat
on the horizon
makes me think of you
you live over there and beyond
i will never see you
I will never hear you laugh
we will never share a beer
words on a page
will never compensate for that
it makes me sad
it’s always a good idea
to supplement a paltry income
she thought of singing elizabethan songs
outside the florist shop near the supermarket
with a little black velvet cap
to receive the coins of well wishers
then she remembered she wasn’t in bologna
Day 19
the taste
of freshly marinated
sicilian olives
of home made french mayonnaise
of vienna schnitzel
of steak and mushroom pies
of vichysoisse
of roast butternut pumpkin paprika potatoes and chicken
creme brulee
food to die for
ma memere told me
darling
if you cook like a french woman
you will always find a husband
no matter how old you are
she was right
just like the cats
the way to their hearts
is through their stomachs
DAY 20
beware
of online purchases
with no money back guarantee
and no return of goods
that sweet well behaved
old german shepherd
in need of a new home
arriving on your doorstep
may not be of the four legged
variety
you were anticipating
DAY 21
leaning on her walker
she shed a tear
bring me my bow
of burning gold
her emotions wound tight
like a spring
like her first walk in the park
since the accident
it was his favourite hymn
DAY 22
what is she !
https://youtu.be/cQhYyowvPTM
who is sylvia
what is she
that all our swains commend her
well she's certainly not
the sylvia of my student days
"what a piece of work"
schubert wouldn't be writing songs
about her
rumours persist that one of her ancestors was responsible
for his "unfinished symphony "
what a surprise !
DAME NELLIE MELBA - 'When I stand on the platform of the Melbourne Town Hall for my first concert. I shall feel the greatest emotion of my whole life'
A musical trivia question: if the girl born Helen Porter Mitchell in
1861 hadn't later changed her name to Nellie Melba, would her fame still
have reached such dizzy heights? Answer: probably, though her
international association with her home town - Melbourne - would not
have been as strong. Try to imagine Sinatra calling himself Franky
Hoboken or The King performing as Elvis Tupelo.
Melba played the patriotic card wisely and well. Despite the best
efforts of some local muckrakers she never packed up to live permanently
in exile.
"If you wish to understand me at all,"she once proclaimed,
"you must understand first and foremost that I am an Australian."It was a
new country; she was its first star on the world stage.
Her triumphant homecoming tour in 1902 was like Kylie, Nicole and Elle
rolled into one. And she milked it for all it was worth, declaring: "I
know that when I stand on the platform of the Melbourne Town Hall for my
first concert I shall feel the greatest emotion of my whole life."Her
appearances were sensations. Her songs ranged from Handel's Sweet Bird,
in which she could show off her vocal gymnastics in imitation of a
nightingale, to arias by Mozart and Verdi and the mad scene from
Donizetti's opera Lucia Di Lammermoor.
But the show-stopper, often the encore, was Home, Sweet Home. Her habit
was to accompany herself on piano when she sang it, invariably reducing
many in the audience to sobs. It became a signature tune; one of her
most common requests. She sang it into a telephone microphone in 1920
for Britain's first international wireless broadcast.
Melba in Melbourne singing Home, Sweet Home is a masterpiece of
programming. But the wonderful thing about the song is that it gets a
cheer (or tears) anywhere. Part of Melba's appeal lay in her willingness
to perform what people wanted to hear. Her concerts and recordings, by
and large, were all greatest hits packages.
She stuck with some songs throughout her long career. Her first recital,
at the Richmond Town Hall when she was six, included Comin' Thro' the
Rye - a favourite of her father, a whiskery Scot. This - like Home,
Sweet Home and Swing Low, Sweet Chariot - became a perennial. But Home
was the one she could always rely on.
Although born in Richmond, she regarded Lilydale as home turf. Her
father had been a shire councillor and owned the limestone quarry there.
In 1909 she bought her property at Coldstream, close to Lilydale.
In 1902, Lilydale had greeted her as "The Divine Songstress whose Magic
Tones have attracted a universal admiration and commanded the highest
appreciation"- which, to her, was no more than she deserved.
Performances of Home anywhere near Lilydale couldn't fail.
One biography describes her spotting a local farmer near the end of a
concert at Coldstream. She asked him for a request; he opted for Home.
Later, greeting him warmly, she told him: "I thought you'd have blisters
on your hands, the way you clapped."
But in some ways it was all a glorious con-job. Lyrics for the song that
is now a musical cliche were written by John Howard Payne, an American.
Payne was many things: an actor; playwright; and diplomat. But he tends
to be remembered, if at all, only for Home, Sweet Home.
Home is wonderfully simple: 11 lines with an elementary rhyming pattern.
There's delicious irony in the thought of Melba - feted on several
continents, a sucker for royalty and titles, and the proud owner of a
country estate - taking a deep breath and beginning:
Mid pleasures and palaces,
Tho' we may roam;
Be it ever so humble,
There's no place like home . . .
It was never really a Melbourne song. But intrinsic to Melba's art was
an ability to transport audiences to wherever she wanted them to be.
Besides, home is where the heart is. And the former Helen Porter
Mitchell always thought of herself as a Melbourne girl. - Alan Attwood
is a Melbourne writer. Melba appears in his next novel.
It was no accident
that Dame Joan Sutherland, a Sydney girl,Melba's lineal descendant and an Australian diva,
also sang Home, Sweet Home as an encore in her farewell shows in 1990. There has always been rivalry between Sydney and Melbourne. As an unbiased Sydneysider I think Dame Joan's performance is the better one.
she can still remember
where she was standing
hearing this song
on the radio
almost 4o years ago now
in a foreign country
alone
friendless
her mind
like the weather
awash with pale grey
the vendor at the market
saying
" things can't be that bad"
they were
then
after a while
they weren't
and now
they are again
except
the weather is better
both sides now
DAY 15
MY GENIUS CAT
here's my little shadow again
he follows me everywhere
he must know shell fish is on the menu for tonight
how does he know
can he read my mind
or can he read the label 'seafood dressing'
on the jar
Day 16
Yes, the common safety pin, a unsung hero protecting fingers since 1849. If Walter Hunt hadn’t been in debt to a friend, who knows if we’d have the safety pin as we know it today. Walter invented it to pay off a $15 debt from the $400 proceeds from selling the patent.
safety invention injury debt fountain design decoration secure clever numerous pocket brass
safety pin
reduced injury
very secure
clever invention
by Walter Hunt
possessed of a fountain of ideas
to pay off a debt
good design
with numerous uses
holding up knickers
with broken elastic
decorative brass ones
for pinning flowers
on collars and pockets
and also fashion items
advertise
for cello students
you will get loads of takers
with no musical interest
let alone instruments
as i 'm on the plain side
maybe if i learn the piano
i will be put on the endangered
species list
like my glam friend
pink cockatoo
DAY 8
Homophone poem
she thought
they were especially close
it had been eleven years
of corresponding
but he closed the door
and put paid to that notion
by spelling it out in an email
littered with bad spelling incidentally
she should have known
she finally realised
he was just taking pity
on a blue lady
a charity case
nothing more
bringing a little sunshine
and blue sky into her lonely life
EASTER SUNDAY
DAY 9
joy to the world
HE IS RISEN
Use a number
DAY 11
CINQUAIN
enough
of this turmoil
i've just had far too much
stop the world i want to get off
wrong bus
SHADORMA
stony broke
it's a way of life
for a few
not so bad
as long as you have shelter
food pen and paper
DAY 12
the sound
of the key in the door
you're home
it always makes me happy
even after all these years
DAY 13.... FORGIVENESS
let there be
nothing to forgive
let it all slide away
or it will destroy you
don't let it touch you
if you're lucky
there will be someone
in your life
who will never hurt you
who truly loves you
and if not
well
in some cases
there's always
a very squidgy cuddle cat
who adores his owner
is always pleased to see her
loves her poems
and the fact that
he eats fresh crab tuna and steak
gets to sleep
taking up most of the space
on a queen size bed
has regular brushing and paw massage
has nothing to do with his deep
and lasting affection for his favourite human( ahem) !
DAY 14
AND NOW FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT
Where the bee sucks, there suck I:
oh dear,not recommended
In a cowslip’s bell I lie;
at your current weight
very bad idea
There I couch when owls do cry.
well we know why they're crying
On the bat’s back I do fly
that wasn't a bat
After summer merrily.
you should really cut back on the mead
Merrily, merrily shall I live now
Under the blossom that hangs on the bough.
in your condition i would say unlikely
Merrily merrily shall I live now
Under the blossom that hangs on the bough
you're delusional darling
Apologies to Will
The Tempest.... Shakespeare
as going to sea in a beautiful pea green boat
with a pussy cat
by all means
be yourself
find yourself
sing "i did it my way"
but the chances of you
being swept up by the wind
gliding into the sunset
on this giant red kite
are minimal
someone else's way
probably a better option
adam would never have been
tempted to eat this apple
not even with eve doing
her jungle boogie moves
quality produce has a lot
to answer for
DAY 1
WRITE A FOOLISH POEM
there are no special fools for april
they arrive in every month
a homogenous bunch of ning nongs
who enjoy a slap up lunch
april fools are show offs
even create a special day
breaking out into song and verse
about how " i did it my way"
they're no more foolish than the rest
and regardless of the month
we all know in the ning nong club
there's no fool like an old fool
they definitely do foolery the best
DAY 2
B Grade movies
.
See you tube...Victoria Wood Brief Encounter Parody
Brits do
B grade movies best
we keep orange pekoe tea
for the middle classes
i know we've only just met
but let's run away
to a leper colony together
my wife's a bit of an old trout\
mad
bad and brilliant
heaving bosoms and tear jerkers
British insanity at its finest
Day 3
A small pot of mint
on the window sill
i break off a few leaves
inhale
smile
and my day begins
DAY 4
life is easier to deal with
since reality became a friend
send the dreams a flying
they will drive you round the bend
no matter if it's stormy grey
or lovely like the buds of may
find some good in all of it
tis the best way in the end
DAY 5
a verb is a doing word
a noun is a thing
well a noun can be anything
what?
even a nun ?
shrieks of laughter from the class
go stand in the corner Rall
detention after school
write 100 lines
i must not mock servants of the Lord
memories
of Mother Loyola's parsing and analysis class
in the primary school
DAY 6
musty furs smelling of face powder
and eau de cologne
silk scarves and stockings
colourful tins of buttons
and coins
hats with feathers and lace
whale bone corsets
nana's wardrobe
a child's treasure trove
aladdin's cave
DAY 7
it's cloudy and grey
three crosses on a hillside
never a good day
