ON THE LINE BETWEEN AUTUMN AND WINTER - TIM SCHAEFER/ TIMOTEO

 timoteo - https://catnip - blogspot.com



 1.

Between what could have been
and what was
lies The Land Of Regret
where the hotel service is lousy
the beds are never made
(the sheets get so tangled)
and it's always raining.
You can go there 
for a visit
but don't stay too long
and never buy 
a one-way ticket
or you will never come back. 


II.

I've had more embarrassing moments
than you
due to a proclivity
for winging it 
in situations that required
a boy scout's preparedness
counting on some magic
unrealism to carry the day
and when it didn't
(which was 99 percent)
I developed a taste for the raw egg
that was dripping down my face
and so I wince
when reviewing the past 
but that die is cast
life is still a blast.


III. 

I journeyed back 
to my little town
population two hundred six
in its heyday
to find it in ruins
the little cafe where all the kids
fed the jukebox and pinball machine
workin' on those night moves
at least in their heads
now just a storehouse
for some rickety furniture
the pool hall 
gone
the people I knew 
gone
it was like a war memorial
in the quiet aftermath 
of a bloody conflict 
where I literally fought
to survive as an 
outcast and a loner
and yet have always felt
better off for being battle tested.



IV.

I stand behind my life 
the way the man who follows
the elephant down the street
with a shovel and a wheelbarrow
stands behind his work. 



V.

No one is unlovable--
if you don't believe it
check out the couples
down at your local Walmart

VI
I can write about old loves

family 

and friends

with no trepidation

and I do.

They don't read my work.

That

intimate stranger

I leave to you.

VII. 

I've searched for meaning

in this carnival world 
that surrounds me
only to learn
there's nothing to do
but join in the dance.


VIII.

It shifted to winter seamlessly
there was nothing you could point to
that said you've crossed over
but somewhere along the line
you did of course
autumn days still mild
nights portending of what's to come
the scent of wood smoke in the air
then one morning you awaken
and the world around you 
has grown cold
and you brace 
for December's finality.


 TIM'S NEW BOOK IS OUT--AVAILABLE FROM AMAZON.COM




The below is a rambling response to Tim's excellent  poem. Originally I wrote it in his comment section but it disappeared into the ether.   So with his kind permission I have written it here for Poetry Pantry -  Poets United. Enjoy!

1
no point in visiting
the land of regrets
always raining
the sheets remain tangled
can never be undone

 2
embarrassment
only occurs when you
acknowledge  and have a regard 
for the opinions of others
i know an american who has had
more embarrassing moments than you or anyone else in the world
clue
a psycho with bad hair fixated on building expensive walls 

3
battle testing is not for the faint hearted
well you are still alive so you won
your tormenters
may have died a grizzly painful death
note  - i resisted saying with any luck
i don't want you to think i'm too awful:)

 4.

good thing to stand behind your life
but i would never stand behind anything
that i could not hit on the head with a frying pan

 5
no one is unlovable
wrong--
you have not met 
my  insufferable narcissistic noisy neighbour from hell

6


 family can be strangers
kindness in strangers 
sometimes not  found in  family
strangers know your secrets 
especially if you are a poet or a priest 


7
you'll never find meaning
by joining the dance
no one is enjoying themselves
it's dancing by numbers

do you own dance 
alone or
with another crazy together

 8
to the ancient greeks
winter was the season of death
all the season cheaters
live in the winter free tropics or sub tropics
a lot of not so ancient greeks made their way down here :)