Napowrimo poem Day 19
Prompt: Light Bulb Moment
The clock was ticking
louder than usual
I lay awake anxious
I gaze over at you
Even in sleep
you clutch the covers taut
hiding your secrets
Life has been a haze
with an uneasy feeling
of impending doom
slow march to the guillotine
It was only momentary
a nano second
but I saw that cloud
move across her eyes
that look of discomfort
a thief caught out
Brushed it aside
we were at school together
she was my closest friend
Flash
A cannon ball hit
A million pieces of mind
splintered and shattered
a fireworks display
And I knew
And - I - Knew
Knowing is always the easy part - forgetting... and forgiving... well...
ReplyDeleteGreat post - great prompt!
Hmmm.... I knew moments are scary moments of truth.-Irene
ReplyDeleteClarity is awakening, but once awake how we deal with pain is part of the healing.
ReplyDeleteNice write!
~mark
Nice poem, I like the way you write :)
ReplyDeletemarinela x
Grip and stir my soul why don't you! Man, my spine is crawling -- damned good Rall! I've read Joseph, Stan, and now you... makes me think I should have passed on the humor and wrote something more serious -- this was just excellent...
ReplyDelete...rob
Image & Verse
What we know, when we know it; these may not coincide, eh? Very powerful.
ReplyDeletenicely understated
ReplyDeleteand intteresting prompt =)
Oh dear! We can all go on in blissful ignorance but the revelation is shattering on all sides.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately, can relate pretty well to that one. Yes, it's a very sobering moment--sort of like acid spilled onto an open wound.
ReplyDeleteDynamite, Rall! Great prompt and great poem! A powerful "ah-ha" moment ...
ReplyDeleteExplosive! Fireworks always do it for me too!
ReplyDeleteThanks for the prompt today, it really got me thinking...
Intense, taut, you really get across that sinking queasy feeling as you way for what you know you will hear...
ReplyDeleteThank you for this prompt.
Rall,
ReplyDeletePowerful and so well written. That is a horrible realization. Thanks again for the prompt.
Pamela
Strong poem, revealing just enough to piece together the story.
ReplyDeleteI've had one of these... more of a punch-in-the-gut ... moments. You've really captured that sudden lifting of the blindness (probably self-imposed).
ReplyDeleteOh that's a real painful revelation. Thanks for the prompt.
ReplyDeletefrom Therese B. -- very moving poem, not funny at all this time. And somehow it goes with the back-stabbing artwork next to it...
ReplyDelete"Life has been a haze
ReplyDeletewith an uneasy feeling
of impending doom
slow march to the guillotine"
Great work!
Rall, I loved the prompt, and the flash across the eyes. I know it well. Well done!
ReplyDeleteWonderfully specific and vague at once. Everyone can see some reflection here... Great! (And a great prompt, thank you!)
ReplyDeleteI loved the prompt today! I wish I could have done more!
ReplyDeleteFantastic poem! You have captured a moment in time so well!
it's all in the eyes.
ReplyDelete(thanks for a great prompt!)
Very nice! I love the way you emphasize the last line! :)
ReplyDeleteExcellent prompt, btw!
Thankyou all for your comments. Pleased so many of you enjoyed the prompt.This not a completely accurate autobiographical poem. It does contain autobiographical elements put into a different context.
ReplyDelete