Rallentanda

Rallentanda

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Pantoum

Wet Monday at Rose Bay

the sky in deep grey shade
with milky custard cloud
cast heavy over the bay
halyards tinkling fluted sound

with milky custard cloud
the wind began to sing
halyard clanging bell'd sound
boats rocking bob and fling

the wind began to wail
rain falls on shell scrunched sand
boats rocking heave and fling
striped brollies inside out

rain pelts on shell scrunched sand
stinging skin and salted lips
ripped brollies inside out
tears washed in white foam waves

stinging skin and salted lips
downpour heavy over the bay
tears washed in white foam waves
the sky in deep shade grey

5 comments:

  1. very vividly described scene...and i really like that you step away from nature to the more personal with including the stinging skin and salted lips, tears washed in white foam waves...the topic works really well with the form..nice..

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  2. lovely painting by words.....enjoyed....

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  3. nice...you really capture the front moving in...love all the little details..how the wind affects...and you center it well putting your narrator in and how it affects them as well....nice...

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  4. I visited briefly but now I think I need a hot chocolate! A very atmospheric piece - in all senses.

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  5. Irish coffee would be better Cosmo:)

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