HUITAIN
theme- seeds
8 line stanza
8-10 syllables per line
ababbcbc...rhyme
you planted that potent love seed in me
it took hold firmly and grew very fast
it wasn't intentional i can see
charismatikos strikes with his hot blast
can reduce a love song to a mere farce
wild passionate feelings throb through her veins
she's happy at last forgetting the past
ignoring the warning of floods and rain
Rall, this brims with passion, transformation, and hope
ReplyDeleteRall, “charismatikos strikes with his hot blast” blazes with energy — that line, to me, unleashes the wild spark that drives the whole huitain. The poem thrums with heat, risk, and headlong feeling.
ReplyDeleteMuch love,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com
Rall, lust's seeds are fast growers but put down shallow roots. Every woman has at one time or another been lured by the bloom of that flower! Great metaphor and wonderful poem!
ReplyDeleteI've not heard of 'charismatikos' before - but the name conjures a perfect image.
ReplyDeleteI've renewed mypoetic license:)
ReplyDeletehi, Rall ð¥°
ReplyDeleteJust wanna let you know that this week's W3, hosted by the wonderful Marion Horton, is now live:
W3
Enjoy!
Much love,
David
SkepticsKaddish.com